Sympathetic Character
by MendaciousMinx
Summary: Ed and GIR meet at the Taco Hut to discuss their similar lifestyles. Solemn and sad.


A/N: Another of my little somethings. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

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Ed adjusted his jacket casually and rested his hands in his lap. He was waiting. This particular kind of waiting, however, differed from his usual type of waiting in one way: he was waiting for someone. Usually, he waited for nothing, preferring to stare off into space rather than be forced to communicate with those around him. On occasion, however, he did allow himself the pleasure of social interaction.

This came in the form of a monthly visit with a friend of his. This month's visit was to take place in a restaurant, the nature of which, personally, he found rather detestable. Due to the particular tastes of his companion, however, he was willing to bear it.

For a moment, he wondered why his friend was late. Perhaps, he thought, he had been held up by the scheming of one of their mutual friends. Well actually, to put it frankly, Zim was not a friend of Ed's. He found the short green man's presence repelling, to say the least. He was reminded all too painfully of Eddy, save that Eddy was mostly harmless. This creature was what Eddy would be were he let anywhere in the vicinity of heavy equipment and given the brain to handle it.

A frightening thought, that.

Just as he was about to leave in favor of somewhere less revolting, the Taco Hut's door swung open. A small green dog with black paws trotted in casually, making its way up to his table without hesitation.

"Hello again, Edward," the dog said, smiling in a friendly manner. "I hope you weren't waiting too long. The main computer attempted suicide, and Zim made me crawl in and debug it."

"Not at all," Ed said easily. "Did everything work out?"

The robot nodded. "Zim downloaded the computer onto a disk, where it couldn't do any harm to itself. The house is out of order, though; nothing works."

"You have my sympathies, then," the tall boy said. "I know how difficult life is without television."

"My sentiments exactly," GIR replied, grimacing. "It's the computer I'll miss, though. It'll be back in a week or two, but it's nice to have someone around who is capable of intelligent conversation. Most of the people on this planet are mind-numbingly oblivious. Present company excluded, of course."

Ed nodded. "So what was your alien's latest scheme?"

GIR thought for a moment. "It's so hard to keep track of them now… I think it was something with a wombat, but I could be mistaken… and ballpoint pens, I believe. What's Eddy come up with?"

Ed offered a dry laugh. "A giant rubber snake. Don't ask me what it was supposed to do, I don't know. Whatever it was, he made me climb inside and jump around while the other kids tackled it. I've got he bruises as proof."

The tiny droid clicked his tongue sympathetically. "It's always worst when they won't even do the dirty work themselves. I suppose if they did they'd mess something up, though. We'd probably come out worse for it, considering their intellect. It's funny, though, isn't it? You get attached to them, no matter how dumb they are."

The human nodded slowly. "I guess you're right. It's like taking care of a pet. You have to maintain the illusion of stupidity—if only for the sake of your sanity—while making sure they stay out of harm's way. Like keeping your dog on a short leash, while making him think he's free."

GIR nodded in silent agreement. A young Taco Hut employee slouched over to the table, asking Ed for his order. Wrinkling his nose in obvious distaste, the boy delicately ordered a salad. GIR smiled at him from across the table, and Ed ordered three plates of tacos for the little dog. As oblivious as most people were, it wouldn't do for the little green mutt to start talking.

They ate quietly together for a while, occasionally posing the odd theory or idea. The two really didn't need to talk to get along. They were kindred spirits. Unseen and unsung puppet masters, holding invisible strings.

The silence was abruptly broken, however, when Eddy stormed through the door with a nervous DoubleDee behind him. "Figures we'd find you here, you greasy lard. C'mon, I'm gonna dredge the lake." He froze in the process of dragging Ed out the door. "Hey, since when do you have a dog?"

Ed glanced bemusedly back at the seat, where GIR had curled himself into a contented ball. The little robot smiled apologetically at him, silently telling him that he would have slipped out if he could.

"What dog, Eddy?" Ed slipped gracefully back into his rolling, stumbling lilt. "I don't have a dog. Sarah doesn't like dogs. She says they're smelly. Do you have a dog, Eddy? Can I pet him? Can I? Can I? Can I?"

Instantly forgetting the green canine, Eddy growled ill-temperedly at his companion. "No, I don't, and no, you can't. Now move it, pudding-for-brains!"

They exited.

GIR made his way outside, meeting Ed's gaze as the tall boy cast a glance over his shoulder. Silently, the human nodded a farewell. GIR returned the nod, and moved in the direction of home.


End file.
